雨天

冰冷，清凉，凉爽

炎热后的一阵雨是期待的….

有人说：“雨天，让人伤感….”

我却说：“雨天，让我欢喜….”

雨天

喜欢它来时阵阵的冰冷，清凉，凉爽…的风与温度

喜欢它来时的休息，特别舒适好眠….

喜欢它滴哒…滴哒…滴哒…打在窗或屋顶的声音

就有这样的念头….

我想以后自家可以有个空间那屋顶是透明的，然后就可以在雨天时倾听那美妙的滴哒…滴哒…滴哒…声

雨天

喜欢在这时躺在床上，闭上双眼听那声滴哒…滴哒…滴哒..

喜欢就在这时候睡一会儿

喜欢一边听着雨滴声一边看着书

雨天

喜欢望着窗外下着雨滴的世界…

喜欢偶尔像电影般，在街上被雨淋湿身上的感觉…

喜欢幻想着电影情节般与女主角淋着雨，一起撑着伞的那种感觉…

在… 雨天

你对它又会有怎样的感觉呢？

雨后

还是会有天晴的一天…

昨天亦昨天

 昨天, 已遥远   昨天, 已过去

明天, 还没来

明天, 看不见

明天未决定

明天复明天

                                          明天是希望  明天亦未来

相信明天会更好

就在零晨十二点多,三个很久没一起看戏的朋友相约到戏院观赏2012 这部电影. 虽然这部戏没什么强烈的吸引感让我印象深刻但每次看戏偶尔会从电影里得到一些启发, 这部也不例外。

完戏后给我印象深刻的有两个. 1, 一幕是达赖喇嘛在他的徒弟面前开始倒茶, 一直茶杯满了还在到….让我有深刻的印象是因为那一幕让我想起了最近在那儿读过的一段小故事一样(不只是一样,是摘录出来的…) 2, 电影的片尾曲Time for Miracles (Adam Lambert ) .

三点多回到家, 我第一件事就是搜寻电影的片尾曲了…哈, 很快便找到了. 第二件事嘛…. 在想着我是从那读过那一段故事……但还是记不起来…哎.. 只记得好像在星洲日报副刊里看到吧…还是在书局里翻看书时偶尔看到的…还是不记得…但因为很有意思，可以给人很大的启发吧….所以便想把它学下来与大家分享这“空杯哲学”。

……有印象的是好像是某某明星说的故事…他说他师父总喜欢跟他说一个故事—“有位博学的和尚去拜访某个德高望重的老师父，老师父十分恭敬的接待他，并替他倒茶，可是在倒茶时，杯子明明已满，老师父还继续倒茶。和尚便说道：“大师，茶已满了，为什么还不停呢？” 过后我在网上找，得确有这样得故事然后还有提到李小龙很喜欢这故事的名言…哈哈，看来上次看到这段小故事有可能从一本叫《醒思录：李小龙的生活智慧》里读到的……

这故事是有名堂的，李小龙讲的这故事叫“倾空茶杯”而网上有些称“空杯心态”。那大师的回应是“我当然知道！但如果你不先倾空你的杯子，你又怎能尝到我倒的茶呢？”这故事的像征意义其实是想告诉大家“一个已装满水或茶的杯子是很难接纳新东西”。它也意味着“我们需要有个好心态；如果想学到更多学问，先要将自己变成“空杯”一样，而不是骄傲自满。”

“空杯心态”并不是要我们否定过去，相反的，它要我们以一个更开放更放空的心态去学习新东西，去适应新环境。换言之，我们需把“归零”视为一种常态来让我们去学习更多动西。哈哈…. 我还发现李小龙很喜欢这“空杯”所带出的意义，他就这么说：“清空你的杯子，方能再行注满，空无以求全。”我们应该像“空杯”那样无惧那“一无所有” 或 “归零”à从一个空杯开始，从新开始，Restart !

      Life, just like an unfinished story book; it’s product that only belong to U. The content of the story, just like the life events while the Ending of the story just likes the future of the life… It hasn’t been decide yet!

      How to continue write the story (Life), How to write the Ending of the story (Happy Ending or Sad Ending) à is all depend on the present moment of U (US) !

   人生就好像一本未完成的故事书, 是一本属于你自己的作品. 故事的内容就好比人生的经历而故事的结局就好比人生的未来, 它还没决定的!

       要怎样写这结局是取决于当下的 (你) 我们 !

       I always think that I have doing little bit effort for recycle but what I found recently…. Is that enough? Is that worth? Maybe is worth but my answer for enough is NO! Why…? I found out that when I doing recycle, I also making Rubbish as well at the same time.

       I can’t deny this effect by the environment factor as well. I hardly can remember I had starting practicing recycle effort since one of the semester during at my Uni life when I stay at my house at section 17. You will not believing if the recycle is not undergoing, how much rubbish that we are making & how much recycleable things that we had wasting. I still remember ever time abt end of semester, the rubbish amount is about time to have deal with it so I will called someone come over to collect the recycle things like A4 papers, biscuit tin, plastic, soft drinks tin and bottle.

As what I like Shakespeare had said: “All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players. They have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts”, I know & awareness that I had my responsibility to doing recycle. I choose to practicing it because I remember what Jackie Chan had said before “I will not wasting my time if I had time to doing public services like donation right now and I will doing immediately” why Jackie Chan had said like this? I remember he had told before he had accident when shooting at Yogoslavia and after the incident he told himself not to wasting time when want doing public services like donation. He said after experience nearly die he will did what possible he can to help other as soon as now. That concept had come to me; even without money I still can start with doing something small that also can help other.

Definitely, practicing recycle is one of the ways that can help other that I can do right now but it always has a brick wall like “my house will become full of rubbish & treating to invite rat and cockroach to come”. Another brick wall is that hardly to get all my housemate to living awareness on this responsibility even we are Uni student & we should know this. But for me it’s like a bull shit… Uni student… so what? We still can still have awareness even we are not a Uni student. I agree with what Randy said “the brick wall is there to let us show our dedication” I insisting to practicing in this way because I understand and I know it was right just like I choosing to doing the right things! By the meantime I show my stubbornness. Adhere to doing something and stubbornness always is 2 faces of realm.

I seems trying blaming around at here but what I feel disappointed is even recycle is practicing but I still making the rubbish for this environment. When throwing rubbish I used plastic beg…when u didn’t eat outside or cook urself take away is a normal phenomena for nowadays people. But take away always treating the issues of using polytetrafluoroethylene. It gives harmful to the environment and wasting space. I can’t deny our government policy is not good enough to making more environment friendly. At my house at sect 17, we always can collect a lot for recycle material like shampoo bottle, soft drinks bottle and tin, paper box, biscuit tin because the people in house even myself always will buy tin biscuit, soft drinks to store as a backup food. That’s why when I found, realize and notice the important to practicing recycle policy, I insist & stubborn to continue it till now….

I hope who ever read this blog…. Friends, pls wake up & realize our little responsibility because even we practicing recycle but we still making the rubbish to this environment. And I hope who ever read this also can start practicing doing good things with small effort that we can do right now. We cannot do BIG but with can start SMALL!

P.S. U will get shock as me before after a period you practicing recycle. U will found it can be so much rubbish as we had made before.

There was few days after the interview, I just what Chinese idiom said “three days fishing, two days bask net”… I was doing nothing at home….only can reading and drawing. Saturday evening, my 5^th auntie calls me and asks whether I want to stay at their house for few days. At 1^st, I feels hesitate but finally I decide went over there because instead doing nothing at home, went out….went to other place can change my situation, my experience ….(maybe).

When I was reach my aunt house, I having dinner with them and it just about 6 o’ clock. The first day, I been treating well… just after an hours after my dinner, my I been treat to eat Durian. Then, I also eat a big bowl of “Fu Zuk Yi Mai’ that been cook by my auntie. I was very full that day because within about 6 hours, that’s all the things I had eaten.

The 2^nd day. I was been ask by my auntie to help my cousin to selling bread, cake and ‘Cha Kuo’ at the front of Kuchao Old Town Coffee shop.

Haha…. Waiter, sales assistant and now I become hawker also…. We selling the selling bread, cake and ‘Cha Kuo’ like

Among the most, I like one kind of ‘Cha Kuo’ called “Pok Chang” in Hokkien. You can called it as “Pan cake” and u also can said it was “Chinese Roti Canai“. It was home made ‘Cha Kuo’ that was selling own by my auntie. I dunno still got people… I mean the new generation still remember the exixting of this kind of ‘pan cake’.  I still remember when I was a child, my mom did cook this ‘chinese roti canai’ pan cake for us. Mmm… from the picture the yellow look pan cake is the one I like cause is sweet. The green one is salty and it was add more ‘ingrediant’ by my aunty. But… I still like the sweet “pan cake’… “Chinese Roti Canai”….We set up the stall about 4/5pm and closed the stall around 10/11pm. When I reach home, it was already 12 something.

Monday, I received a call from Kelly Services and I been told that I had not been selected for the job that I had attend the interview previously. I feel disappointed because my journey for seeking job had to start over again and continue…. Today, I still helped my cousin to selling at the stall. That day, our bread, cake and ‘Cha Kuo’ was selling fast.

I was back to PJ at Wednesday night. This was how I spend in this few day…… Hope can faster find a job.

I’ m not only like to read all those book related to psychology and I also like to read self- help or motivational book (and seriously it help me a lot). Personally, I also like philosophy so I will also read some spiritual book that can give me some insight. Although I’m not a Christian but some time the book I read will quote some sentence from the Bible and I also like it because it like philosophy that can give me some insight. Recently, I just impulsively bought a Chinese translation book called The Power of Now 当下的力量>> by Eckhart Tolle. It was a spiritual book and I just start reading few pages. I feel what he write was quite true also and I feel had some sort of difficult to practice… Nowadays, I obviously jump to read different kind of book at a time during a month period after graduate. Like previously when I read Dale Carnegies book, I also jump to read another Chinese book that regarding the body language. Last few days, I did jump and read a few page of book that are related to Buddhism and I also finish a book called “the way to Happiness” (I guess so if not mistake) at library that related to some monk and actress include Jet Le that review their view of Buddhism. I found the meaning that had written and share by them was quite meaningful and I can learn from it that related to my recently crush maybe (Haha… what ever).

I had told at my previous writing regarding a girl that I had meet just only 4 or 5 week before I graduate. I did meet her few times during the 4 week and few days before finish final exam. I still remember I had written that I was notices this girl when I at Y3S2 during my short semester….Fire exit practice….. But maybe I was too busy I had not met her so obviously during my last year last semester last 4 to 5 weeks. Perhaps like what I giving to this title, maybe it just a crush… but who know future things. But back to reality, I had to accept it… maybe the time haven’t come….

I had read a sentence that had share the Buddhism view by a Dalai Lama name Singa 盛噶仁波切. The sentence was written like this:

Blind heart/Blind passion/Blind love like the flower inside the mirror

(痴心犹如镜花),

Cannot catch; cannot touch

(抓不到摸不到)

Is easy to break apart when touched

(一触即破)

Cannot get it back

(不复可得)

In Buddhism view “Because of blind heart, we cannot understand the truth, not yet justice, cannot understand karma, it was just an impulsive emotion.”

“人因痴心,不明真理,不尚正义,不知因果,仅凭情绪冲动”

So…

Love, what is love? Love her beautiful face? Love his brilliance? Love the innocent smile or his honestly? Did I really understand what love is? Perhaps I didn’t know that and perhaps I just can’t differential between the feelings of love and like. Should I perverse toward all this?

In Buddhism, perverse (执著) always explain in more positive manner and the attitude that describe toward perverse always moving forward because we cannot predict the future, outcome and result. Even we cannot get the outcome or result that we expected or desirable and yet we not need to impose because in this world, everything had causes and effect. If we do to impose, not only we can’t be happiness, furthermore, it was human greedy, desire that make destructive. Once again, what I read from the book that explain the true meaning of no perverse (不执著) in Buddhism was actually request human to keeping a peaceful mind and attitude and the good attitude of no perverse can practice through this modern said “No matter what the result/outcome is, the process is important”. I quite agree with this meaning because every time after the outcome I get what I remember the most was the process that I had go through and the enjoyment of the outcome was so fast that can vanish in my mind. Maybe I should remember the process — the days I meet her, the day I saw her, the day I talk to her because although it may just a crush but it did make up a piece of memory in my life.

Maybe the time haven’t come… maybe it just a crush….who know? Only Heaven know… only God know… or maybe I should put down… In Buddhism perspective, Can’t put down actually come from greedy, it was perverse and it was perverse toward enjoyment. Put down (放下) is not mean that doing nothing, thinking nothing and everything is emptiness. Buddhism explain that Emptiness (空) was mean that everything was not always still, everything was changeable, everything was meaningful & everything should be appreciated. When I read this statement, I know that may this just a crush and maybe is just a beginning. Everything was not always still… YA… I can feels it and I experience it now. The crush… our met just a few weeks… the opportunity also not always there. Everything was changeable… Mmm I agree also because if I think in another way everything can change if u makes your effort and maybe one day I can meet her again somehow I didn’t know yet and maybe we can be a couples (who know…). And I didn’t forget that changeable here also include that my feeling toward her also may change if it just a crush. Everything was meaningful…. I believe that I can notice the exiting of her was some sort of fate or destiny (maybe…). The process…. I mean the days I could saw her, talk to her was meaningful. Although she appear in my life just like a ‘crush’, a wind that blowing here and blowing away just like that but it already become a meaningful piece of my life puzzle. Everything should be appreciated…. I should appreciate the opportunity that the God had given to me… I mean the opportunity to notice her exiting, the opportunity to saw and met her in my last few weeks before I graduate and also the opportunity to talk to her. Put Down in Buddhism view was means don’t constraint, don’t mean, recognize and understand everything clearly & don’t perverse. Not perverse will bring no suffering and it will not attracted by desire. This was the true meaning of put down whereas it can help us to reach a peaceful mind state.

Flower that Buddha Hold

(This story was write based on my memory after I had been quite a time I read it and it may miss something and some I really forget so SORRY for that….)

One day, Buddha was sitting in front of the prayers. Buddha had raise up the hand to pick up the flower and then Buddha was doing nothing and just put it on hand. All the prayers were feels strange and everyone try to figure it out what was the meaning behind this? When everyone try to figure the meaning of why Buddha doing such, one of the prayer name ____________ forget… had smile to the Buddha and then Buddha also smile to him. Finally, Buddha told all the prayers said that _________ will ……. forget… because he understands what I was doing. Actually, Buddha was trying to show the beautiful flower to all the prayers but all the prayers seem keep thinking on what are the meaning behind this hence they miss the beautiful flower that present in front of them. Only ______ forget… had saw the beautiful of the flower and that’s why he smile to the Buddha.

The story are bring out some message to all of us that actually everything like beautiful, peace, love and etc. was already beside & surrounding us only we didn’t realize it. SO…. When we are walking on the road, why not try to walk slowly and see and enjoy the surrounding view like house, flower, bird and butterfly that fly over. The story also try to bring out the meaning of appreciate the present moment we having right now. Just like the book “the power of Now” Realize your present moment…. What we can do on present moment… enjoy the present moment and don’t miss the beautiful things that around us!

Giving in Buddhism view

I want to share 2 values that I had found in a book called “the way to Happiness” (I guess so if not mistake) at library that related to some monk and actress include Jet Le that review their view of Buddhism.

I will share a value that I read in a chapter of the book that had share the Buddhism value by Master Xing Yun. From this book, now I start understand and realize that actually giving in Buddhism can practice easily. Buddha said: “Giving and Receiving, the important was giving rather than receiving. There had receiving if there had giving.” Actually when I read this chapter, there had four Buddhism value but I only can remember giving so I just share what I learn from the meaning in Giving. When I read this chapter, it writes out meaning that can reflect the reality human view about giving. “If I not money, how I can give….” This was the most common misperception by nowadays people. We not need to wait we are rich then we can practice giving. That was a lot of way to practicing giving.

Giving can practice through just a simple SMILE. When we smile to other, actually we already practice the value of giving. Giving a smile to other can comfort other feeling and it was a kind of giving. Giving a smile actually was a reciprocal because it was natural when u smile to other, other will also smile to you.

The second kind of giving that easily we can practice was said Thank you! No matter where you are we can just simple and easily giving other with a word Thank you. Example: “When u at restaurant, the waiter comes to serve you and this was the good moment that you can practice giving. After the waiter serves you, you just can simple and easily said Thank you.” We can say thank you when people help us. We can say thank you when people show concern to us. Good word will not hurt people so say Thank you more.

Another way of giving that we can give was greeting to other. Just a simple “Good Morning, Good Afternoon, Good Evening, Good Night and Hi, Nice to meet you.” Moreover, giving a help to other was also another kind of giving we can practice. SO… Help other a lot also was very simple giving that we can do without any money we need to pay to give.

What else we can give… Giving our love, giving our concern to other….Now, u can know that actually giving can easily practice in our live and it not need to wait till we are rich.

Continue….

When I was on the way back to Pasar Seni, I plan to call for another interview at Jalan Raja Chulan. This 3^rd interview was far more mystical that happen on me. Why? I still remember I fall asleep a while and when I wake up I still blur and that time I was almost at Pudu I think. But I was too early come down from the bus. Lucky, when I walk down, I can found Imbi monorail station. Before I get into monorail, I make a phone call to the person in the ad. Why I said mystical…? This advertisement I was found on Sin Chew and what so mystic was it only write “Customer Services, Contact person name and phone number & the venue just state near Raja Chulan monorail”. So I just try again.

When I reach Raja Chulan monorail, I call the person, Mr. Tan. He was then giving me the instruction through phone how to reach the company. It sounds like challenging right? I’m lucky because the place was not so far. I start from Istana Hotel and went down to a white building then pass by the Public Bank on the right the I go straight till the “SEI HOY CHEN 四海桭 building” then go to AmBank building. After that, walk through a small road on left. I can see KWSP building on right and lastly I will reach the MCB plaza. The company name is Kelly Services. I went on to 17 floors for Kelly Services Call Center to meet Mr. Tan. It was my 1^st times I get know with Kelly Services. Kelvin told me that they did come for the UTAR during career fair. Fantastic, I didn’t know that and now I will interview by Kelly Services.

Interview with Mr. Tan was just a 1^st interview and I thought it was already a formal interview. Then I know that, Kelly Services wad a company that employ by other company to help them find employee and filter and select candidate for the formal interview. When I reach there, it almost 3 something. The interview was taking shortly I had to wait for the call for 2^nd interview on Tuesday (9 June 2009). Everyday, I will imaging and pray that I can call up for attending second interview. My goodness, maybe the pray worth… they call me on Monday for attending Tuesday interview. Thanks to God, Buddha… I was exciting to prepare what Mr. Tan had told me “wear a long sheave formal shirt and he always told his candidate that if u attends the interview u had 50/50 percent to success and getting the job.

9 June (Tuesday)……I wake up early. After read newspaper, I went to bath and prepare to dress up my formal wear. Before I went out, I take a simple breakfast, “sandwich” (egg+ white Bread & hot dogs) and a cup of MILO + cream cracker. I went out about 11am. When I reach there, it was just 12 something. I’m early an hour before the time they told me (1pm). I had another short interview with the unit manager before I went for the briefing session regarding today interview. All the the candidate had to wait the Australian employer who in charge for the interview. I had to go through 2 interview session which was group interview and face to face interview. It was another good experience for me because I haven’t attach with this kind of more formal interview some more it was my 1^st time experience what group interview was look like.

In group interview, we were giving 2 tasks. First task, I had to find a partner and then talk to them and listen to them regarding a few question that had request us to ask like ( name, previous company, favorite colour, slogan on T-shirt and Building & Structure and why). After that, we both had to present each partner regarding the question. I guess the purpose for this task was test for listening skills and surely presenting skills. Everyone is written down all the information including me. But when the time I present, I try to be different without looking at the paper but lastly I forget 1 slogan of my partner. He gives me two slogans. One was D-up (is meaning defend) another that I forgot and let me read it from the paper is “In Case of Emergency add Cold Beer”. Sure that I still remember what I had told my partner regarding the 5 question. I told him that my favorite colour was Red, Blue and Black. Slogan (U make the choice, Not the Choice Make U). Lastly is building. I told him is Pyramid and the reason I give was Mystical, wisdom knowledge.

During the 2^nd task, 18/19 of us had divide into 2 groups for another activities. In this activity, we were going to examine working as a group— team work. We are giving a scenario that written like this a group of people are on plane and the plane had crushed on a mountain that was cold condition, the area was out of radio signal and u had to choose 10-item from the list from the plane in order to keep your group survive. I still remember the item that our group had chosen.

1)Matches

2)Small hand-axe

3)Chocolate bar

4)Nylon rope

5)Torch Light

6)First-Aid tool box

7)Compass

Brandy

9)Something for shelter…

10)……(forget)

Every one of us had to present each item that we had chosen and explain why we choose it. I still remember why we choose Chocolate bar instead of fresh water and apple on the list. We think that chocolate bar provide us energy. The high calories can burn and warm up our body and the fresh water can replace by the snow that can easily get from the surrounding mountain. Brandy was chosen instead a carte of beer because it contains high alcohol. It can warm up our body and also can used to set up the fire.

After the group interview, I had to wait for face to face interview. During face to face interview, again I was interview by 2 people, the Australian guys and the Chinese women. I had been asked about why I taking psychology but applying in this job the not related to psychology field, how I can apply the psychology knowledge in this job. I had also been asked how your referral will describe you and how your friend will describe you. Lastly, the Chinese women had to ask me in Mandarin and I had to speak in Mandarin when I response to the question. The purpose here was to test my second language ability. I had ask to used Mandarin to describe myself and I also been ask to speak in Cantonese. When the interview was finish, it was 4 something.

Now, what can I do now was just what the law of attraction and law of gender said “let go and let god”. I had to let go my wish and pray to Universal, God and Buddha and the result will remain to the God now. Only God can help me. Surely, I need a job now but now I only can let to the God. I only can pray to God, Buddha….